...STAY ON THE BALL! Seriously, please make sure you open your fucking eyes.
Blah Blah Blah cyclists are renegades blah blah blah no regard for the road rules blah blah blah. No, just keep your fucking eyes open. Yeah, some cyclists are renegades, but way more drivers are renegades, as my friend Matt found out when some fuckbag was texting and veered into the bike-lane and messed him up.
Luckily he escaped without any major injuries, but it could have been a lot worse.
I follow the road rules 98% of the time, but that doesn't mean that almost every day that I ride my bike I have to avoid an accident with a vehicle. Last night for example:
Mr. Dick Sock is stationary, indicating to turn right, waiting for traffic to clear. Mr. Cool Guy sees vehicle, judges that it will be safe to continue riding in the bike-lane down the left-hand side of his vehicle, as he is allowed to do. Mr. Dick Sock gets impatient with having to wait for traffic to clear so as Mr. Cool Guy is about to pass him, quickly changes his mind and indicates to turn left and then accelerates without checking his mirrors. Mr. Cool Guy employs sick to the power of rad stopping skills, and skids to a halt right at his passenger door. Mr. Dick Sock starts mouthing off about how he indicated and Mr. Cool Guy should watch where he's going. Mr. Cool Guy flips, tells DS that he's a cunt and he was in the wrong, and manages to get one good punch to Dick's window before Dick speeds off.
Next time I'll fucking kill you Dick Sock.
As a side note, I wish that piece of shit cop Senior Constable Farquharson was there to see that it is in fact possible to perform an emergency stop on a track bike. Then maybe he'd stop hassling people who ride them around Fitzroy and instead go do some worthwhile police work that actually benefits the community.
(I was thinking about this at about 5:30am this morning, and I thought I should add that people make mistakes. Dick Sock made a mistake. Not all mistakes should be met with anger. But if you make a mistake and then not only deny any fault, but try to lay blame elsewhere, don't be surprised when someone wants to see what colour your blood is. Especially if it's in a situation where you could have caused serious bodily harm.)